How Can I Prevent Sexual Violence? > Intervention Skills

Intervention Skills

Everyone can help to prevent sexual violence by speaking up when you hear comments that support oppressive and violent beliefs and behaviors and intervening if you see a situation that may potentially result in sexual violence. All it takes is a little courage and practice.

Find the words and actions that feel most natural and comfortable to you. Practice with a friend, so that you can feel more confident when a situation does arise. And remember, always put your own safety first!

Suggestions for Intervening

Sexual violence occurs on a spectrum, from seemingly harmless catcalls directed at women on the street, to date and acquaintance rape, to gang rape at gunpoint. To the degree that we "let" the little things happen without saying anything, we tacitly support a sexually violent culture. When we don't think our speaking up counts for anything, we contribute to an environment that lets perpetrators get away with it (which they do, disturbingly often).

Think of your sister, your mom, your girlfriend, or one of your good friends in a sexually violent situation. What if someone watched or knew it was happening and did nothing to stop it? How would you feel? Do you want to be that kind of person?

Getting involved doesn't have to be (and ideally shouldn't be) a big production. Small interventions can make a big difference in a questionable situation. Just distracting someone, saying something, checking in with a person can stop the momentum of something bad. And if it wasn't going that direction in the first place, it's certainly not going to have hurt to check in.

You always have more than one option as a bystander.

Even in your regular life you can help prevent sexual assault without doing a whole lot. You can:

• Speak up if someone's putting down women.
• Offer to drive your friend(s) home from a party.
• Pair up with your friends at parties to keep an eye on each other.
• Talk to a guy who manhandles women and suggest he get help.

If you're in a situation where you see something weird happening, you can:

• Distract the couple in order to diffuse the situation.
• Take one person aside and distract them.
• Offer to call a cab for one of the people.
• Track down a friend of one of the people and have them check on their friend.
• Knock on the door.
• Directly ask one of the people what's going on. (If it's a guy and a girl, it's a good idea to ask the girl away from the guy.)
• Shout something so everybody hears, like, "Hey, what are you doing? Leave her alone!" and stick around to make sure the situation has cooled down.
• Talk to the girl at some point and let her know you saw what was going on and that you're willing to help her.
• Open the door and ask if everything's cool. Interrupting an okay scene is better than standing around while a rape takes place.

Of course it can be awkward to intervene; there's always the risk of being a little embarrassed or embarrassing someone else. You might tell yourself that you're overreacting, or that it's not your business. You might also fear that you are the only one who will speak up or that you'll end up in a fight.

On the other hand, who wouldn't be willing to be a little embarrassed, knowing that someone cared enough to check on them? And chances are that there are more guys (and girls) out there than you know who feel the same.

It takes some character, sure, and some guts to be the kind of person who will intervene. But at least you've started the conversation. All it takes is one person.

This information is adapted from the WHY NOT ASK website

Other Resources

Check out these resources and challenge yourself and your community (e.g., friends, church group, sorority, fraternity, dorm, co-workers, etc.) to:

• pledge never to commit, condone nor remain silent about violence against women. Visit WhiteRibbonCampaign to find out more.
  
  
• pledge to do your best to help your family, friends and peers in potentially dangerous moments concerning alcohol, drugs, and sexual assault. Visit Pledge for Action for more information.